False Hope

I want to talk about false hope. I hate it. It isn't the same thing as hope. I think only a person can give herself (or himself) true hope. This comes from within.

Living with infertility, we know what the odds are. We know the odds against us and the ones in our favor. We know what we face. 

In the beginning sure, we try to cling to similar stories, but in reality this just leads to jealousy, resentment, and disappointment. After a while we start to feel so alone. We are the only ones going through this. This isn't necessarily true, as 1 in 8 couples experience some sort of infertility.

However, we are the only ones living our actual story. There are so many different factors that go into trying to conceive. The woman's hormones, cervical mucus, ovarian response, egg quality, tube and uterine structure, uterine lining, immune response, the man's sperm count and quality, their timing, and so very much more. That's just for timed intercourse, even more goes into procedures like IUI and IVF being effective.

We cannot count on "such and such worked for so and so". ALL this tells us is they are part of the "good" odds. We ALREADY knew those existed, that doesn't make us automatically part of it. That isn't how it works. Just because it CAN happen, doesn't mean it WILL.

I see this sort of thing on the BBC all too often. My group is for people with  realistic expectations. We only promote that. I lose respect for people that want or try to force anything less. That may be harsh, but I cant stand for the disappointment that happens later, OR the "I told you so" just to be rubbed in our faces. There is no need for either of those.

Giving me helpful advice backed with reputable sources is all I need.

Trying to get back into the swing of things again.

So I havent written an actual post in a while. I havent been ttc, so there really havent been any updates. Im still not for the moment, but I am a group owner now for an actively trying board on BabyCenter.

I'm surprised at the misinformation that is out there. Then there are really good questions that have answers that arent easily found.

I want to keep this blog about ttc and helping spread accurate information with reliable sources to back it up.

I'm going to try to move my story to the back, and focus more on the questions I have and see. Keep in mind, I'm not a Dr or a scientist. Fertility information is just something that I am very passionate about. Im only gathering information that I find to have it in a central place.

This blog is not huge, and it doesn't reach a lot of people, I just want to do my part as much as I can.

Welcome

So I started out trying to blog about many things, but that didn't quite work out. I kept getting distracted. Then trying to conceive started to not only take longer than we wanted it to, it started taking over my life.

I have PCOS, which is poly cystic ovarian syndrome. For me its a secondary infertility. I do have an eight year old daughter, and I have had three miscarriages in the time between then and now. I knew when starting that I most likely had pcos due to previous drs appointment in 2008 which I will explain in another post. I knew that if it didn't happen immediately, it wouldn't happen for a while.

So far I have been trying to conceive for about nine months now (As of February 2014). This isn't a long time compared to most infertile women and for that I am thankful. By one definition I do not fit the description of "Infertile" which is having unprotected sex for 12 months without becoming pregnant. However since I do not ovulate, and I cant get pregnant without ovulating, I am infertile. Most of the time that's hard to say and to think about, but I have come to accept it. Denying it isn't going to mean I'm not, it isn't going to fix it.

Here I would like to share all of my experiences. I track my cycles with bbt, which is basal body temperature, opks, which are ovulation predictor kits, and a ferning microscope. Since it is already cycle 7, I will be recapping past cycles and appointments in their own single blog posts.

I also link a lot of the words to online research and even other blogs so I can bring more information to light about infertility and PCOS. I really hope this helps you as much as it helps me. Thank you for reading.